BERGEN COUNTY MOMS

When a child experiences anxiety, a parent’s natural instinct is to step in and make the discomfort disappear. While this response comes from a place of love, certain accommodations can unintentionally reinforce the anxiety cycle over time. S.P.A.C.E. Therapy (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) empowers parents with practical, evidence-based tools to respond differently—helping children build confidence, independence, and long-term emotional resilience with

As parents, our primary job is to prepare our children for life. Yet, so much emphasis is placed on academic preparation for college, often at the expense of nurturing the attitudes and skills that truly help them navigate life’s challenges. While a solid education is important, preparing for life goes beyond textbooks and classrooms  —it involves encouraging our kids to experience life firsthand. We are all experiential learners; we learn best by doing. The lessons we learn

A goal is connected to an emotion. It’s great when the emotion is excitement; your brain will naturally want to move toward it. However, if it feels like pressure — something you need to do or should do — instead of something you want to do , your brain will see it as a burden. You’ll likely procrastinate and maybe give up. Your brain gives you what you think most about: the good, the bad, and the ugly. What if you stop using "need to, have to, and should" and replace them w

With the season of giving upon us, you’re likely searching for thoughtful gifts that build connection and resilience rather than just adding to the toy clutter. As a licensed psychotherapist specializing in child development, I’ve compiled my top ten therapeutic resources that make excellent holiday gifts while supporting your child’s emotional growth and mental health. These aren’t just books and toys—they’re evidence-based tools that help children develop crucial skills lik

In my world, a curious question is designed to help your teens think for themselves and learn to problem-solve. A curious question is not: checking up on your teen. a way to make yourself feel better that things are getting done. to help you feel empowered, that you’re doing something. ‌ Because curious questions are not about you. ‌ Let me say that again. Curious questions are not about you. ‌ They are entirely about your child. They are questions that nudge your child int

The holidays have a way of bringing everything to the surface—love, loss, gratitude, regret. Even the anticipation of the season can stir up emotions you thought were settled.  When you’re estranged from an adult child, those feelings can intensify. A time that’s supposed to be warm and joyful can instead feel tender, complicated, or even painful. If this is where you find yourself, you’re not doing anything wrong. You might be torn between wanting to celebrate and wanting th

Every parent’s worst nightmare: your child’s screaming, blood is spilling from a deep cut, and your heart races with fear. You scramble for a towel, trying desperately to stop the bleeding, and without thinking twice, you rush to the emergency room, hoping that everything will be okay. But here’s the truth: many parents don’t realize until it’s too late: the ER isn’t always the best place for your child to get stitches, especially for facial or visible cuts. Between the long

I'd had a bad morning. Things were happening around me and I knew I had to keep my distance. This is really hard when I’m overwhelmed by all the things that can possibly go wrong in the aftermath.  I didn’t call anyone, didn’t stick my nose into the problem between other family members. Instead, I went into distress.   As I’ve heard it said, my mind is a dangerous neighborhood and I should never go there alone. Duly noted.   So I listened to an interview with Melody Beattie,

What we need and what we want for our children with disabilities are often at paradoxical odds with one another. The idea of “independence” comes up a lot, particularly when we’re discussing therapies and schooling, but we do not mean in the absence of human connection . The idea of “productive member of society” comes up when we are defending the worthiness of adults with disabilities who may or may not be able to fully participate in the current job market, but we do not me

Rock bottom and estrangement - the turning point you didn't choose. In addiction circles, you often hear the phrase "rock bottom." It's that lowest possible point where despair takes hold of you, and you feel hopeless and helpless.   For parents facing estrangement, rock bottom may come when you finally realize your child truly won't answer your call... when another birthday passes in silence... or when the holidays bring more dread than joy.   Rock bottom is different for ev

GIVE ME, BUY ME, GET ME. Your teen may know how to spend money, but do they really understand how to manage it? Talking about budgeting and saving isn’t enough. Having an open-wallet policy won’t teach them how to save, invest, and wisely spend money. And when they spend and you pay, you end up resentful at their lack of appreciation. Your teen must experience the process to learn the skills. And the skills are more than just creating a budget. In the  November 18th  Group P

Whether your child had stitches after a playground tumble, a kitchen accident, or a sports injury, you’re likely thinking: how can I help my child heal well and what can I do to minimize scarring?  The good news is that a few simple scar care steps at home can go a long way in making sure your child heals smoothly and with the least visible reminder of their injury. “The care you give in the days and weeks after sutures can make a big difference in how your child’s skin heals

Join Our Virtual  Adolescent & Multi-Family DBT Group  Starting  November 13!  Gain skills and support for the whole family, all from the comfort of your own home. What is DBT? Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is a structured, skills-based program designed by Dr. Marsha Linehan. It’s a  gold-standard approach  for individuals and families dealing with intense emotions, communication breakdowns, and behavioral cycles. The program  teaches practical, life-changing tools  acro

Which labels were given to you? Which ones have been given to your child? · ADHD · the shy one · the over-achiever · OCD · the trouble-maker · the smart one There’s nothing inherently wrong with a label (which is really shorthand for a group of symptoms or behaviors). It’s how we let it define and limit us. None of these labels and diagnoses means that we can’t live a satisfying and joyful life… unless we accept the predictions that go with t

Halloween is an exciting time of year for kids! Below are some tips from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) to help ensure they have a safe Halloween holiday while trick-or-treating. Safety Tips: A parent or responsible adult should always accompany young children on their neighborhood rounds. Obtain flashlights with fresh batteries for all children and their escorts. If your older children are going alone, plan and review the route that is acceptable to you. Agree on a

Standing up for yourself doesn’t mean putting others down. Let’s talk about realistic, effective boundaries. Parents are notorious for struggling with boundaries. I was (and still am, sometimes) one of them. We’ve been conditioned—especially moms—to believe we should always be available, putting everyone else’s needs first. The “good mother” ignores her needs, loses her identity, and has trouble saying no. That’s not healthy for anyone. A boundary is not about cutting off con

“What does it cost to invite, to welcome, to come to know someone, to accept them, to befriend, to need, to love?” -Erik Carter, Ph.D. When life becomes optional, we learn to debate the pros and cons of sustaining it. We live in a capitalist society, with dwindling social services that currently coincide with increasing costs of living, so it’s no wonder that money becomes a major consideration when a family is discussing whether or not they can “afford” a baby with Down synd

Would you like to be their safe place? It takes a great deal of trust, as teens are wary of sharing with parents. These are confusing years for them with a lot of conflicting feelings, wants and needs. Let me do it myself!   I still need help. Don't tell me what to do!   I'm scared I'll mess up. You don't know anything!   Neither do I... I want to fit in.   I also want my own identity. Parents are confused, too. ️ They used to tell you everything, and now

Becoming a mother brings profound joy alongside unexpected challenges. While many people expect pregnancy and the postpartum period to be filled with happiness, the reality often includes complex emotions, physical changes, and mental health struggles that catch new mothers off guard. At the Lukin Center for Psychotherapy , we understand that maternal mental health deserves the same attention and care as physical health during this transformative time. Our specialized materna

As a college preparatory school whose students expect to attend the most selective colleges and universities, it is critical that Saddle River Day School gives its students the knowledge and expertise that will prepare them to successfully research, write, and present academic papers in the Upper School, the SRDS Gateway Diploma program , and beyond.    Because we believe that practice makes progress, the process of teaching our students these critical skills begins in the M