I’m a Mom. I’m every Mom. We might not have the same circumstances, titles, roles, and lives, but we are all Moms. We all want the same things for our children. And although my day might be a little different than my friend up the street, we all can find extraordinary moments in our ordinary everyday lives. All we have to do is look. And when we get a chance to see it, it all becomes so clear.
When “A Day in the Life,” came to fruition, I was hesitant to allow someone to capture the everyday fuss and muss of the day with a camera. But then I decided, wouldn’t it be amazing to see my life through a different lens?! What would I find?
Megan Khichi Photography specializes in lifestyle and documentary photography and followed me around for one day (7 am to 6 pm). It was surprisingly easy to go on with my normal day. I didn’t put make up on or get dressed, per usual. I didn’t even shower. Eek. But, I was ok with it. Because, when I look back on my day with three little kids, I want to see exactly how it was. And through this process, I learned so much about myself.
I honestly couldn’t believe what I found in the tiny little spaces between and around my day.
1. I found patience.
This is me picking out clothes for my 6-year-old. (over and over again). What she finally settled on, was changed before she hit the bottom floor. Comfort is key. But it is hard to find something she likes to wear and feel comfortable in every single day. And she refuses to pick it out the night before. As I said before, patience is key.
*Megan Khichi photography*
There were so many times when I could have lost my patience. There were so many times when I could have become frustrated with time crunches, in and out, and the up and down of the day. But, I didn’t. When I look back on the day, I usually chastise myself for losing my patience that one time. But what about all the times that I don’t. What about all the times that we hold it together as parents? When I finished a day in the life, I wasn’t sure how it went. But when I saw the pictures, I realized that I have more patience than I thought. And maybe my kids see that too. That’s life through a different lens.
Doing hair, getting shoes on, and having breakfast with 10 minutes to spare. An image of madness and calm all at once.
*Megan Khichi Photography*
Taking my little one aside to try and debate her out of a tantrum. It was time to go. And she wasn’t ready. Patience is definitely a learn as you go process. What works and what doesn’t; it is hard to tell. Each child responds differently. She thankfully responded and left without a big meltdown.
“If you lose it, we aren’t coming back.” Oh, she wanted to come back.
*Megan Khichi Photography*
2. I found laughter
I actually laugh more than I thought I did. When I see my husband in the evening and he asks me how my day was, I’m not sure what to say. “Good,” I say because it was mostly good. What I saw though was that it is actually great, because I am laughing. I am laughing at my kids. I am laughing with other people. I’ve always been one who laughs often. I’m happy to report, that raising kids isn’t always so hard and tragic. And my 22 year old self is still in there somewhere, rolling around the ground, holding my stomach at something funny. We always say, “nobody warns us how hard it is going to be.” No, they don’t. But they also don’t warn you about how fun it is. Take note of how much your children make you laugh. I see it now although it has always been here. Dance moves. Silly comments. Facial expressions. I need to soak it up. I know one day, it won’t always be this funny...my kids will grow up. So, I understand the need to embrace the incoherent sentences from my 3-year-old, my middle’s rocking moves, and my oldest and the way she throws her head back to laugh at her sisters.
Changing my little one’s diaper with 5 minutes to spare. She leaked through her pants as we were out the door. I’m laughing at her little, squishy legs and the fact that we had no time left to get everyone to school.
*Megan Khichi Photography*
After school, I was laughing at my middle daughter who always says, “What’s that smell?” and plugged her nose. I’m probably also very happy because I’m holding my afternoon siesta.
*Megan Khichi Photography*
3. I found strength
Strength comes in many forms. There is physical strength, mental strength, and strength of character. There is nothing like children to test every facet of strength that you may or may not have. There is a reason we all fall down face first on our beds at the end of a long day. No matter what grind you are doing, you need strength to get through it. We aren’t kids anymore. We are adults with major responsibilities. We have life in our hands to shape and from like dough. We knead, we pound and we try to make it in our likeness. When we decide it’s time to bake, it is our mental strength that gets us to that point.
My 8-year-old did a flip for the first time on this jumping trapeze. I find sometimes strength is learning to let go and let your kids try something new. This is one of my hardest traits to master. Letting go is a slow process. It takes time. It takes enormous amounts of inner strength. We build roots. And then we make sure they stay firm into the ground when it is time to fly...
*Megan Khichi Photography*
Physical strength is another way to grow through mind and body as well as strengthen my strength, if that makes sense. The power of the mind is everything when raising children. We need moments of quiet to do that. Otherwise, it becomes an uphill battle of battered cookies and burnt buns. Meet your life in the middle. Find a way to strengthen your strength. Do what feels good and feeds into your needs and soul. I do Bar Method. I may shake from the sheer agony of some of the moves, but I grow exponentially in attitude and conviction.
Little weights. Lots of reps. Lots of thinking. Building character and strength
Thank you to the Bar Method in Ridgewood for allowing pictures.
*Megan Khichi Photography*
4. I found love
I think everyone needs to do “A day in the life.” It is so eye opening to see the love your kids have for you. More importantly, being able to see life’s precious moments on a reel. We are always so busy with hustling and bustling that sometimes we forget to look hard at what is right in front of us. We try and do more now than ever, be more. Oftentimes, it is hard to take a moment to let little moments saturate our hearts. I know I have to remember to do that; remember that it isn’t always a grind, sometimes it is about the things we do for our family. Sometimes it is about what happens in between the big moments. What I found through this process, is that these little kids mostly just want to be with us whenever they can. And that is all. Simple as that. Click.
Megan Khichi Photography caught something that I do often. I don’t even realize it. I gently grab my kids’ chins.
What do you do that you aren’t even aware of? What love do you show your kids on a daily? What little sentiments are wrapped up and tied tight in a bow for them to open? A simple touch can go a long way. Take note.
My middle child is not lost in the middle. We always find time to slap five, snuggle and these moments are the ones we need to focus on. Both of us. This is love.
*Megan Khichi Photography*
I never had a sister. So, seeing this always warms my heart. My oldest and youngest. I’m never blind to these moments and I’m lucky to be able to witness it. A hand through the crib.
*Megan Khichi Photography*
Snuggle tank. We fill up before we go out for the day. However long it takes. This is love caught through a different lens.
*Megan Khichi Photography*
“Life’s like a jump rope. Up, down, up down” – Blue October
And we ALL do some sort of grind.
We all find moments to ourselves and moments dedicated solely to our families. We all are going through a process of growth, even if we don’t know it. We all have lives like a jump rope.
Sometimes it is hard to see the ordinary as extraordinary. But, it is there. Sometimes you just have to change the lens, change your focus. Take it from a different view. Look to the left. Mundane is looking in the same direction, at the same things, every single day. Extraordinary is looking at the same thing, every single day with a different lens. I never thought that my lens was clouded, until I saw it clear and in focus. Yes, there are ups and downs. Yes, there are moments that are hard and that test you. Yes, there absolutely is the mundane. But, there is also more. And if we are lucky, we will see a shift, when our ordinary lives become something more and when you realize, there is nothing more that you need.
“As ordinary as it all appears, there are times when it is beyond my imagination”
-Jhumpa Lahiri, Interpreter of Maladies
Noreen Heffernan, Writer, MA in Public and Corporate Communications, Certified in PR , Writer, Growing Ladies and Beautycounter Consultant,
Noreen.heffernan@gmail.com