My daughter, who is in second grade, said some girls are telling lies about her on the playground so others won’t play with her. I know these things will happen and continue to happen. I know I’m in for it, with three girls. My advice is always the same, tell your own story, stick up for yourself; you are in charge of yourself and you have the ability to speak up. And the second thing I always say is this, people will always see the truth.
My husband and I always talk about this. How sometimes we notice things and talk about it and he always says, “if we see it, chances are, so do others.” That is the honest truth. Good behavior is observed just as much as bad behavior is noticed. Lies won’t hide the truth. People will be seen for who they are.
At this age, or any age for that matter, if you allow anyone else to tell your story, they will use gray instead of blue, which means, they will paint your life in the wrong color. They can twist and turn it to make you look a certain way, use orange when you are yellow and then what? Do you live your life in orange? Give in to it and change your reality? Or do you show it and tell it, your way, in bright and bold yellow? (And I swear I didn’t just read, “The Day the Crayons Quit.”)
Always be your own best advocate, as a mom, dad, friend, co-worker, daughter, son, etc. Tell your story! If you are a neon girl, use the brightest colors; if you like it dark blue and black, do it up. Let it be dark and full of depth and use it to steer your path. It is your story to tell. It is your narrative. Tell it your way.
There are people who will use the right colors. They are the good ones. Keep them close. And then there will be people who tell it in even brighter colors, enhancing and coloring in layers and layers. That’s your front row.
For those who change it around and misuse the colors, take it by the hands and redefine it. You cannot be afraid.
I swear I’m learning it just as much as my daughter is…
I swear I’m learning how to speak up…
And at the same time, I’m teaching my girls the same. Don’t let anyone else tell you who you are.
But one thing that I already know, is my color. And when I paint my picture, I’m using the brightest yellow in the box. What’s your color?
Noreen Heffernan, Writer, MA in Public and Corporate Communications, Certified in PR , Writer, Growing Ladies and Beautycounter Consultant,