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Connections by Noreen Heffernan, Writer

Updated: Jan 8, 2021

Connections by Noreen Heffernan, Bergen County Moms

Put aside the enormous pile of laundry or the never-ending to-do list right this minute. Sometimes it does feel like, even during a pandemic, how it is hard to come up for air, like you constantly have your head in a brown paper bag breathing in and out while the bag deflates and puffs out and you are no better or worse. Does this thing work?

Why is it harder to get out the door now? Why does a drop off to a “safe” activity seem like you are literally trudging through quicksand. Must. Pick. Up. My. Foot. Oh, and remember that we are trying NOT to get Covid?! Why not, let’s add to it; worry has a new life of its own, weaving its fabricated story in your head, taking hold and leading you down a dark path filled with fear. Is this PMS or Covid? My friend and I had this very conversation the other day. We BOTH got a test and it was PMS both times. Sorry to any male readers I may have. Hi Dad.

And why do decisions seem SO HARD? Should I, or shouldn’t I? I think I can, but I’m not sure. Should I go? Should I stay? Where’s my hand-sanitizer? How many people? Where? Masks? AHHHH!!!!

The hard truth of these times is that life is scary at times, confusing, and hard. But, the biggest of all is that it is, right now, at this very moment…isolating. The isolation could be the worst of it all. And, after almost a year of stay at home orders and social distancing, fearing hugs and get-togethers, I will say that there is one thing that I think we need more than ever, and that is connection. Quick air hugs and smiles behind masks are not cutting it.

I have a lot of 2021 goals that I won’t bore you with. I will always be on a journey to figure things out. It is just how I’m wired. I will always be trying to better myself and seek out people doing the same, gravitating towards sunshine. More than anything, being better is an inside job. But, one straight forward goal I have this year, is to build real, genuine connections. I think most people have the same need. When you ask women what they want, it is to be accepted, included, thought about, invited, and built up. The sad truth is that it won’t always happen the way you want it to happen and with whom. Sometimes, people will take things the wrong way. Sometimes people will literally turn their back on you. Sometimes people will get upset with you for reasons that are their own perceptions. These things will always happen because we are imperfect humans. But, here is the good news. I’m here to tell you, there are people out there who want to build a connection with you. There are people who want a genuine relationship that is deeper than surface, one that gets nitty gritty. There are people, even in this new Covid world of isolation, that want this more than anything. We need this. And it’s time to receive it. Some connections need to be rebuilt, some loose strings need to be retied, and maybe some need to be built anew. But, let me tell you, there will always be people who are willing to accept you, love you, and be there for you.

So, rest assure, even if you feel like sometimes things are happening behind the scenes, you have a scene of your own to transpire, safely of course. Maybe you feel left out at times or that the person you want to be connecting with, isn’t giving anything back. Well, there will be someone who is out there, who will dive deep.

So here we go 2021. Let’s build connections this year. Let’s build each other up. Let us be there for each other. Let us build bridges that stand the test of time. Yes, it feels like we missed out on a lot in 2020. But we also learned a lot. And we found new appreciation for standing still but maybe even a greater one for moving forward. Even if it feels like we are moving forward in quicksand. Even if, that forward movement is only a step. At least, we are moving. Let’s move together.

Cheers to a happy, healthy New Year. All the best in 2021.

Noreen xx

Noreen Heffernan, Writer, MA in Public and Corporate Communications, Certified in PR , Writer, Growing Ladies and Beautycounter Consultant,

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