Switch Flip by Noreen Heffernan

A few weeks ago, I wrote a post that I never sent. I had a really terrible, off week. One of those “the world is ending” weeks; one of those, “I’m a terrible Mom” weeks.

I wrote:

“Today is a day that I truly feel like I don’t have anything together. Nothing is clicking for me. Nobody is clicking with me. I am missing my stride. I know it is just a moment in time and everything will be back to normal in a few days. I have so much to do and I can’t get anything done. I miss school, desperately. School is the equivalent of everything wonderful and happy for me. I know they are learning something. I know there is no TV involved, and in the end, it makes me a good parent. I’m a good parent and all I did was drop them off.

I’m currently between school and camp. Now, I’m a mediocre parent. Last week was a long rainy week and so I was a poor parent. How on earth do I keep my kids entertained between the hours of 8 am and 7 pm with rain involved? When the sun is out, it is definitely easier with the parks and swings. When it is raining, it might as well be January and 20 degrees for all I care.”

I realized after I wrote it that it sounded so negative and pissy (for lack of a better word). The truth is nobody wants to hear me rant. We all have hard days. So, I stopped myself and decided to turn it around and write Blink (posted last week). After I wrote it, I felt much better. I flipped a switch in my head. I clicked it and I instantly felt better. I decided to focus on how much my 2 young girls have changed my life for the better and how time flies and that we need to make these moments count. I decided to make it count. Sometimes, it is all about our perception. Sometimes, it isn’t about what is actually happening but how we perceive it. Our perception is our reality. And then, how we react.

The truth is we have the ability to change our perception and create a new reality. We are moms, yes. We have hard days, yes. School is over and we have to deal with changes, yes. But, we have the ability to make it all count and see it all in a positive light. I’m seeing it.

My dad just said to me today, “your thoughts become your actions.” We were talking about behavioral patterns. This is something we have all heard in our lives. It is the truth. Behavioral patters start with our thoughts. Our thoughts create our actions. He took it from a quote by Lao Tzu. He wrote: “Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habit. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.”

If we have negative thoughts, we will in turn, act negatively. If we continue on this path of negativity, we will become negative people. If we think it, we will become it. I know it sounds simple, but it is hard to do. It has to be consistent. We have to continuously keep our head above water and see the beauty of the day. And on those rainy days, we have to try and find the sunshine within. And if we think good thoughts, good things will happen. Like yesterday when my kids played all day together without fighting. They were working off me. I know they were. And I was smiling. And so were they.

So, I guess what I’m trying to say is that if you find yourself barreling down a negative path, flip the switch. Make a change. Look at something positive. We are all moms. We are all in this together. It isn’t always easy, that is for sure. But, we are all playing the same game, trying to do it with the best intentions. So, we keep going. And if we can perceive our paths in the best light, I know we can make the best plays. In the end, the people who will benefit the most from it are you and your family.

Have a happy, healthy and safe 4th of July.

~Noreen Heffernan,Writer, MA in Public and Corporate Communications, Certified in PR Writer, Growing Ladies