If you're making on-the-fly decisions with your kids, stop talking. You don't need an answer right away.
I know it's hard not to take action. You want to get it out of the way, reduce the whining (yours and your kid's?) and move on.
But sometimes you're making that decision for the wrong reason.
* Is it really in your child's best interest?
* Is it to make you feel better?
* What are they learning?
Take the PAUSE. You don't have to answer right away. Tell your child you need some time to consider it.
They probably won't like it. (Heck, they definitely won't.) Yet you'll be teaching them about being more thoughtful and making decisions for the right reasons. They'll take it into their own parenting and relationships. I call that a win.
Fern Weis is a certified life coach who learned that caring and good intentions are not enough in parenting. In fact, they are often the problem! Fern supports parents of teens and young adults who are going through difficult situations, including addiction recovery. She helps parents release guilt, end enabling and confidently prepare their children to thrive through life's challenges. Her articles are featured in Thrive Global, Medium, Motherly, The Teen Mentor, and Bergen County Moms.
Learn more about coaching and classes at www.fernweis.com. And then download your free guide, "Five Powerful Steps to Get Your Teen to Talk." For information on Family Recovery programs, visit www.familyrecoverypartners.com.
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